Hit or Miss and Manna From Heaven

Saturday night was smooth and then Sunday night turned out to be the worst night since we had been home from round one in the hospital.  The magic of the Boppy turned on me and she would only sleep while being held in it.  Which meant I was up with her from midnight until my mom came in the room at about 6 am.  She slept off and on and did some eating, but because I had to hold her I couldn't pump and her 3:30 formula only feeding led into a total meltdown!

Fortunately things were better the last two nights but now we seem to be struggling with falling back to sleep after eating during the day.  She fights going back to sleep (despite yawns and closing her eyes) and then gets overtired and worked up.  We must just be too interesting and she's afraid she's going to miss something:).

Yesterday we had visitors who left at about 5:30 and she was up to see them off and then stayed up (with only a few 10 minute cat naps) until 10.  JT, my mom and I traded off trying EVERYTHING and she finally just conked out after my mom sent JT and I to bed.

I don't know what I'm going to do when my mom leaves.  She had been taking on the late evening shift so I get a couple hours of sleep before the night shift begins.  I can only pray that this little phase ends before Monday when she goes back to PA...

Having my mom here has been great!  We have gotten lots accomplished, it has been nice having company during the day and an extra person to help me get some extra sleep.  With the extra help at the beginning of the week I kept having this nagging thought in the back of my head  "Don't get used to this.  You still need to figure things out on your own.  Next week it's back to normal!".

However, I realized that this nagging voice was dampening the joy of the current day.  I need to look at each day this week as manna from heaven.  That each day this week I do have an abundance of support and that I need to focus on this day not what may or may not lie ahead.  I am stealing my current joy by getting ahead of myself.  So beginning right now I am focusing on this day.  I am focusing on the time with my mother and my daughter.  I am focusing on the moments of rest, the moments of support and the moments of joy