Water Breaks

I posted my lamenting yesterday on two of the message boards I visit. This response from Ruth74 really struck a chord with me:

"One of my the things that helped me was giving myself permission to NOT be patient. Sometimes, I think patience is actually overrated. Internal temper tantrums are okay. I had my share of external temper tantrums as well - the key is figuring out when, where, and with whom to have them. I did all sorts of different, and sometimes contradictory, things to get me through. I nested: set up a nursery, bought baby stuff on clearance, read books. I reveled in child free living: went to Israel with my synagogue, took long walks by myself, ate nachos for dinner. I hid away all the baby stuff I’d collected: took down the crib, boxed up clothes, moved things out of the house. I did everything people suggested and everything people told me I shouldn’t, and both were helpful at some times and hurt me at others. I talked to my rabbi, talked to my mom, prayed, reached out to friends, and asked people not to talk about it. There were times I enjoyed other people’s kids and times I avoided them.

Give yourself permission to do whatever you need to at any given time, even if other people don’t get it. Remember that this is more like a distance race than a sprint, and your water stops may look different than others’, but it’s you who they will sustain."

elizmusicmaker chimed in with another value nugget of perspective:

"Faith is really important to me, too, and I think God would rather us come to Him honestly with all the hurt we feel, than stay away until our emotions are “pretty.” Throw that tantrum, and be real."

Between supportive responses such as these, prayer, some meditation on a Pinterest search entitled "patience", and day of being a slug at home with my best friend (who I am lucky enough to be married to!) I am feeling infinitely better today. This water break was just what I needed to move onto the next leg of the journey.